Friday, June 24, 2016

Don't Worry, Celebrate

This morning, I'm sitting outside drinking coffee. I got on Facebook and saw a friend lost his mom. My husband is with his family waiting to hear what will happen with his uncle. A relative on my side is going through chemo.

So, I called my grandma. She is older and wiser. But, I didn't even get to ask her any questions other than the normal how are you. She told me about a visitor that was coming to see her and asked if I was going to be home tonight. I told her no and we talked for a little while longer. Grandma has her good days and bad days. Today was a good day. She told me she didn't think the visitor would recognize her. I asked her why and her reply was because she needed something to help her walk now. The last time she saw this person she couldn't hardly sit still because she felt she had to be doing something.

While I sit here and ponder how things can be so scary and sad in this world, I'm reminded that there are good things too! Yes, sad things happen. Yes, scary things happen. No, I don't have to be weighed down by them. I can rise above them and be optimistic. God conquers all of the scary, sad things in life. HIS church is on the rise. HIS church is growing. He CONQUERS ALL.

Too often, I get into moods that I constantly feel depressed. I cry for no good reason other than I feel sad. I don't always know why either. I worry about what will happen to the world my children live in. I have to make a choice, sometimes daily, to be happy. Then I remember, I'm still breathing. I woke up. I have a family. I have a house and food. I live in a country where it is still my choice whether or not I worship Christ.

Through God's word in Philippians 4:6-7: "Don't worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." I give my worry to Him through prayer. He reminds me that I can be happy. I can live knowing HE will take care of me and I need to rest and let Him take care of what I can't control.

Father God, I come to you today with a sad heart. I know the things of this world are too much for me. I stress and worry about the things that will happen in the future. I ask that you take this burden from me and replace it with the joy and comfort that only you can. Help me to remember as I go through this day, you are in control. Praise be to you for the victory that is coming! Remind me to celebrate with joy throughout so that my children and all those I come into contact with will know of you. Amen




Saturday, June 18, 2016

Father's Day

Father's Day can be a terrifying day for some people. It can overwhelm them, make them sad, and leave them exhausted. Depending on the year, I can totally relate to each one.

With that being said, I have four fathers. First and foremost my father God. He is my number one fan. He loves me unconditionally despite all my faults. He wakes me up every morning. He allows me to experience times of hardship to draw me closer to him. He asks for me to listen to him and obey everything he tells me. I, sadly, do not always appreciate him, run to him, or even seek his advice.

Next, there is a guy who accepted me as his own, even though I wasn't. Growing up, I thought he hung the moon and stars. As I got older, I knew he had many faults. One of those faults was a sickening disease. He was an alcoholic. He drank. He was unable to keep a job. He fought with my mother. He made things hard. Despite all that, he taught me. He taught me things didn't even want to know. It takes hard work to keep things together. If you want anything, you will eventually have to work for it. The sad part was, he taught me this because of what my mother had to do because he couldn't. He also taught me that everyone makes mistakes. He suffered the rest of his life because of the choices he made when I was younger. Alcohol eventually ended up taking his life.

My third father also took me in even though I wasn't his. He taught me tough love. He taught me frustration. He taught me not to quit. Growing up with the 2nd and 3rd fathers, I had loyalty issues. I argued with the third because I thought he was unfair. I thought he loved his own children and my brothers more than he loved me. After the 2nd father passed away, I grew a little closer to the 3rd. I'm still not very close with him but I can understand where he came from and what it must have been like to have me as a step-daughter. YUCK! I apologize for a lot.

Finally, my biological father. Not knowing him for a long time and then not liking him when I did know him probably taught me a lot too. Unfortunately, I haven't really discovered what those things are yet. However, I do know that as our relationship progresses, I learn bits and pieces about myself.
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There are many men that have influenced me in my life. It is not just tied to these four fathers. In addition, my grandfather, my uncles, and my father-in-law have greatly influenced me. Each of these men has possessed a quality of my first father. He knew I would need many of them in my life. It wouldn't be until later in life that I would understand that I needed HIM first and always. To each of these men, thank you for giving me a piece of you. I hold each of you so close to my heart.

To those men who influence a child, young or old, thank you. If you are a step-dad, a biological dad, adopted dad, foster dad, or granddad; you are a very important person. You are building future leaders, husbands, and wives. Thank you for turning to your father, earthly and heavenly, for guidance. May God's wisdom, grace, and blessing be with each of you this year and many more.